Random Jokes Friday Funnies #348

I'm calling this post random jokes because that's exactly what they are. They don't fit into any category at all, they're just random jokes. Random Jokes Blonde Style I haven't had a blonde joke for quite some time, so the first of my random jokes is going to be a blonde joke. A blonde wanted to sell her car, but no matter how hard she tried she just couldn't find any buyers. She calls Suzie, her friend for advice, and her Suzie asks her how many miles she had on the car. The blonde tells her she had over 235,000 miles on the clock. Suzie says, "That's your problem. You've got way too many miles showing. I have a mechanic friend who can help you with that," giving her his card. "Just tell him to turn back the miles to whatever you want." So the blonde goes to the mechanic and tells him to put the miles to 40,000. A couple of days later the Suzie rings and asks if she'd sold the car since her friend dropped the miles. The blonde told her, "Are you kidding? Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!" Random Jokes Morgue Style Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces.  After he examines the bodies the coroner calls the police to tell them his results.  “First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous…

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Irish Blonde Joke Friday Funnies #203

Yep, it's Friday Funnies time again and I'm about to thrill you with an Irish Blonde joke. We all know that people love to laugh at the Irish. We also know they love laughing at blonde jokes, so when I found an Irish blonde joke I knew it would be a hit. Irish Blonde Joke At The Casino An attractive blonde from Dublin arrives at the casino and bets twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude.' With that, she strips from the neck down, rolls the dice and yells, 'Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!' As the dice came to a stop, she jumps up and down and squeals 'YES, YES, I WON, I WON!' She hugs each of the dealers and then picks up her winnings, her clothes and quickly leaves the Casino. The dealers are left staring at each other, completely dumb founded. Finally, one of them asks, 'What the hell did she roll?' The other answers, 'Stuffed if I know, I thought you were watching.' Of course there is a moral to this story. Not all Irish are stupid and not all blondes are dumb. But men are men and it just takes a couple of bouncing tits to distract the hell out of them.  :tongue_laugh_ee: Come on you gals, I know you liked this joke, so why not share it with your friends and make their day.  :smoke_tb: OK, put your thinking cap for this…

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Ranch Jokes Friday Funnies #200

Ranch Jokes that make people laugh. I came across some of these ranch jokes in my email the other day and they got me laughing so loudly that I had to include them in this weeks Friday Funnies. Seeing as how todays Friday Funnies is the 200th post of Friday Funnies I wanted it to be especially funny. I hope you find these ranch jokes as funny as I did. A Female Ranch Jokes That Will Floor You A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick  your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. Finally he…

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