Best Pub Friday Funnies #270

For this weeks Friday Funnies we’re going to some unknown pub somewhere in the world. At this unknown pub 3 blokes, as blokes do,  are discussing which country has the best pub. And The Best Pub In The World Is….. “As good as this bar is,” said the Scotsman, “I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow , there’s a wee place called McTavish’s…. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he’ll buy the fifth drink. That is definitely the best pub” “Well, Angus,” said the Englishman, “At my local in London , the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two. Clearly, that is the best pub” “Ahhh, dat’s nothin’,” said Paddy Sheehan, the Irishman. “Back home in me favourite pub in Galway , the moment you set foot in the place,…

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Why Men Are Happier

Yep, it’s Friday Funnies time! After a hard working week behind them, more and more people are flocking to see what Fridays Funnies has in stall for them. This weeks Friday Funnies is all about why men are happier than women. I’m sure that there are a whole lot of women out there who would agree with today’s ‘Why men are happier’ post. Why Men Are Happier Than Women Why Men Are Happier People……. What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack… You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this…

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Before I start my Smart Arse Answer Compilation I want to apologize for missing out the last two weeks Friday Funnies. My excuse is that I was flat out doing renovations on my home that I just didn’t have the time. I painted 4 rooms and laid floating timber floors in my bedroom.Now that that is behind me and before starting my next stint in renos I managed to put together a rip roaring Friday Funnies in form of this smart arse answer compilation. Anyway, I figured as how I’ve written so many Friday Funnies you could always check out the archives. That or hopping over to my sports betting blog to read all the funny sports jokes. SMART ARSE ANSWER 6 It was mealtime during a flight on a British Airways plane: “Would you like dinner?” the flight attendant asked the man seated in the front row. “What are…

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Funny Short Jokes Friday Funnies #267

Everyone likes short jokes, especially if they’re really funny short jokes. That being the case I’ve decided to devote this weeks Friday Funnies to a whole heap of really funny short jokes. In case you’re wondering where these funny jokes come from, I get them from emails that people send me. I know I may have mentioned that before but I’m putting it out there for all the new readers that continue to flood my Friday Funnies posts. So, without further ado lets checkout my funniest funny short jokes. The Funniest Funny Short Jokes Picked her up in a night club. She Looked like a woman. Smelled like a woman.. Danced like a woman. She even kissed like a woman! But as we arrived back at her apartment she reversed her car into a tight parking slot in one fluid movement! That’s when I thought – Hang on just a…

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Sex Joke Friday Funnies #266

I’m sure that I’ve included a sex joke or two in my Friday Funnies but I don’t think I’ve ever structured one around the sex joke keywords. As bloggers we all know how important keywords are to get noticed by the search engines. For this reason this week’s Friday funnies will include a sex joke or two. Now we all know how our beloved postman are sometimes known for their sexual exploits. The thing is sometimes it’s not always their fault. This story relates such a time. Postman Pat…A Sex Joke It was Postman Pat’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same villages and towns. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a…

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Senior Jokes Friday Funnies #264

Today’s Friday Funnies is all about senior jokes. I’ve featured a lot of senior jokes because they are so funny. Posts like, Seniors Are Senile? Friday Funnies #248, Seniors Make You Laugh Friday Funnies #198 and Friday Funnies # 34, Crocodiles, Old Women & Aunty Acid. The following series of images were all part of an email I received titled Senior Eye Test! I don’t think I’ve reached the ‘senior’ stage yet but I sure as hell struggled with some of these images. Let’s see how you go. Senior Jokes Senior Eye Test In conclusion I thought it should be called the Dirty Mind Test. Which one was your favourite? It seems, as far as seniors are concerned, most young folk don’t appreciate all the knowledge they have accumulated. Some actually don’t believe some of the stuff they hear. This next story involves a couple of seniors being questioned by…

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Chinese Joke Friday Funnies #263

A Chinese joke? Why not a Chinese joke. After all, we’ve been picking on almost every other nation. So for this weeks Friday funnies I thought a really funny Chinese joke is just what we need. The Hong Kong Dong Chinese Joke This bloke who’s just been to Hong Kong notices that he’s developed a bend in his penis. As time goes by the bend gets more and more pronounced. He’s so worried about it he decided to go visit his doctor. The doctor never having seen anything like that before decides to run a series of tests and consults with a whole lot of colleagues. When the bloke returns for a followup appointment the doctor asks, “have you been to the anywhere near China in the last year or so?” “Yes I did said the man”, frowning with worry. “Did you happen to have sex whilst you were over…

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Irish Sex Joke

I’ve got heaps of Irish jokes as part of Friday Funnies but I reckon this will be the first ever Irish sex joke. OK, maybe not the first Irish sex joke. I remember some while back I wrote a an Irish sex joke about any Irishman waving a towel trying to get his wife to orgasm. OK, so this will the second ever Irish sex joke on Friday Funnies. The Mating Call For The Irish Sex Joke Two Indians and an Irishman were walking through the woods.All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave. ‘Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!’ he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering, ‘Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo He then tore off his clothes and ran into the cave. The Irishman was puzzled and asked the remaining Indian what it was all about, ‘Was…

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