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Motorbike Jokes Pt II Friday Funnies #370

I hope you like today’s Friday Funnies which is all about motorbike jokes. I do believe that this is the first time that I’ve featured motorbike jokes in a Friday Funnies post. Oops, I did a quick search of my blog and discovered I did do a motorbike in March last year. You can read that joke here. It’s hilarious.

Motorbike Jokes Picking Up Girls

motorbike jokes

A 10-year-old girl was walking home alone from school one day when a big man on a motorbike pulls up beside her. He follows her for a little while, then turns around and says to her, “Hey there little girl, how would you like to go for a little ride?”

“No way!” says the little girl as she quickens her pace.

The guy on the motorbike pulls alongside her again and asks, “Hey, little girl, I’ll give you ten bucks if you hop on the back.”

“NO!” says the little girl as she hurries down the street.

The motorcyclists pulls up alongside her again and say, “OK kid, this is my final offer. I’ll give you twenty bucks and a big bag of candy if you go on the back of my bike and let me take you for a ride.

Finally, the girl stops, turns and face the man defiantly with her hands placed firmly on her hips. She screams out, “Look, Dad, you’re the one who bought a Honda instead of a Harley. YOU RIDE IT!”

Karma And The Motorcycle Cop

They rushed a motorcycle patrolman to hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated on him, and when he came round, he was relieved when they told him all had gone to plan, and he was going to be okay.

But the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. He was worried that something might be wrong, but he was still too weak from the surgery to do anything. Eventually, he managed to pull his hospital gown down enough to check what was causing the discomfort. When he looked down at his chest, he saw three wide strips of ultra-adhesive tape stuck firmly to his hairy chest. Written on it in large black letters was the message:

“Get well soon… from the nurse who got a ticket from you last week. I’ll be round to remove the tape later.”

Check out my Laughaholics jokes so you can keep the laughs coming. You’ll especially love my latest Funny Blonde jokes video. While you’re there why not join my growing YouTube Channel. As you know I’m always looking for new subscribers so why not consider subscribing to my My Bonzer Channel

If you ever wondered how to remove a background from an image you should watch my Removing the background with InPixio Photo Clip.

Of course, you know you can always get more laughs at my Friday Funnies posts, not to mention my Heaps Of Jokes.

Jokes aside I reckon you’ll like my latest in a series of videos called Aussie Adventures In Italy. Episode one is called Randazzo.

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Funny English Boy Friday Funnies #369

The funny English boy is a funny story about a young lad that works in a supermarket in England. This young boy could be Little Johnny’s cousin. 😆 Anyway, have a read of the funny English boy and let me know in the comments below what you think of this short story.

Funny English Boy Who Thinks Fast

funny English boy

A man went into a supermarket and tried to buy half a cauliflower. The very young greens-produce assistant told him that they sold only whole cauliflowers. The man persisted, and asked to see the manager, and the boy went to find him.

Walking into the stock room, the boy said to his manager, “Some wanker out there wants to buy half a cauliflower.” As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the customer standing right behind him, so he added, “And this gentleman has kindly offered to buy the other half.”

The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way.

Later the manager said to the boy, “I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people here who think on their feet. Where are you from, son?”

“Cardiff, sir,” the boy replied.

“Why did you leave Cardiff ?” the manager asked.

The boy said, “Sir, there’s nothing there but prostitutes and rugby players.”

“Really?” said the manager. “My wife is from Cardiff.”

“You’re kidding?” replied the boy. “What position did she play?”

See, he’s a quick thinker isn’t he?

Check out my Laughaholics jokes so you can keep the laughs coming. You’ll especially love my latest Funny Blonde jokes video. While you’re there why not join my growing YouTube Channel. As you know I’m always looking for new subscribers so why not consider subscribing to my My Bonzer Channel

If you ever wondered how to remove a background from an image you should watch my Removing the background with InPixio Photo Clip. I’ve also found Luminar 3 to be a fantastic photo editor.

Of course, you know you can always get more laughs at my Friday Funnies posts, not to mention my Heaps Of Jokes.

Jokes aside I reckon you’ll like my latest in a series of videos called Aussie Adventures In Italy. Episode one is called Randazzo.

Continue Reading

Funny Sicilian Cow Story Friday Funnies #368

Hey guys, I’m back from my Italian holiday and I thought that this week’s Friday Funnies would be about a funny Sicilian cow story. Once I’ve told you about the funny Sicilian cow story I’ll mention another funny Sicilian story, something that happened to me when we were leaving Catania to drive to how holiday home in San Gregoria Sicily.

The Funny Sicilian Cow Story

funny Sicilian cow

The only cow in a small town in Northern Italy stopped giving milk. So the town folk found they could buy a cow in Sicily quite cheaply.

So, they brought the cow over from Sicily.  It was absolutely wonderfulIt produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.

They bought a bull to mate with the cow to get more cows, so they’d never have to worry about their milk supply again.

They put the bull in the pasture with the cow but whenever the bull tried to mount the cow, the cow would move away.

No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull, and he was never able to do the deed.

The people were very upset and decided to go to the local veterinarian, Dr Santucchi, who was very wise, to tell him what was happening, and to ask his advice. 

Whenever the bull tries to mount our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward.

When he approaches her from the front, she backs off.  If he attempts it from the one side, she walks away to the other side”.

The veterinarian rubbed his chin thoughtfully and pondered this before asking, Did you by chance, buy this cow in Sicily?”

The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned that they had brought the cow over from Sicily.

“You are truly a wise veterinarian,” they said. “How did you know that we got the cow from Sicily?”

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eyes:  My wife is from Sicily.”

Now is the best time to check out my Laughaholics jokes so you can keep the laughs coming. You’ll especially love my latest Funny Blonde jokes video. While you’re there why not join my growing YouTube Channel. As you know I’m always looking for new subscribers so why not consider subscribing to my My Bonzer Channel

If you ever wondered how to remove a background from an image you should watch my Removing the background with InPixio Photo Clip. I’ve also found Luminar 3 to be a fantastic photo editor.

Of course, you know you can always get more laughs at my Friday Funnies posts, not to mention my Heaps Of Jokes.

Continue Reading