Everyone likes short jokes, especially if they’re really funny short jokes. That being the case I’ve decided to devote this weeks Friday Funnies to a whole heap of really funny short jokes.
In case you’re wondering where these funny jokes come from, I get them from emails that people send me. I know I may have mentioned that before but I’m putting it out there for all the new readers that continue to flood my Friday Funnies posts.
So, without further ado lets checkout my funniest funny short jokes.
The Funniest Funny Short Jokes
Picked her up in a night club. She Looked like a woman. Smelled like a woman.. Danced like a woman. She even kissed like a woman! But as we arrived back at her apartment she reversed her car into a tight parking slot in one fluid movement!
That’s when I thought – Hang on just a minute!
I saw my mate Charlie this morning, he’s only got one arm bless him. I shouted, “Where you off to Charlie?”
He said, “I’m off to change a light bulb.”
Well I just cracked up, couldn’t stop laughing, then said, “That’s gonna be a bit awkward isn’t it?”
“Not really,” he said. “I still have the receipt, you insensitive bastard.”
I’ve accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.
My next crap could spell disaster.
Went out last night and got really wasted.
I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring and farting … so, at least I got home OK.
Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport.
“Nationality?” asks the immigration officer..
“German,” she replies.
“No, just here for a few days.”
I woke up this morning at 8 and could sense something was wrong.
I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn’t know what to do.
Then I remembered – the local cafe serve breakfast until 11.30.
“Jesus Loves You.”
Nice to hear in church but not in a Mexican prison.
I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature.
She said, “I would like to come back as a cow.”
I said, “You’re obviously not listening.”
And so ends another Friday Funnies. I hope today’s post brought a smile to your face and that you liked it enough to share it with your friends.
You can always find more funny jokes over at my sports betting site. If you have time to kill you may even want to check out the rest of my Friday Funnies posts. Just keep in mind there’s a whole lot of them.