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I thought for todays Friday Funnies I’d just post a heap of funny photos.

Funny Photos To Make You Laugh

The first of our funny photos series is actually banned on Facebook. It took place after Kylie accepted a stuffed bear at one of her concerts.

funny photos kylie

I reckon you’ll get a kick out of the next funny photo.
Friday Funny funny photos

The next in our funny photos series displays a bit of ‘naughty’ Aussie humour  :devil_tb:

friday funnies funny photos

Friday Funny funny photos1

funny photos ebay

funny photos mouse

Images aside I need to keep the word count up to keep Google happy. They tell me Google likes at least 300 words and so for SEO reasons I’m including a joke to keep that word count up :wink:

There is a medical distinction between “Guts” and “Balls”. We’ve heard colleagues referring to people with “Guts”, or with “Balls”. Do they, however, know the difference between them?

Here’s the official distinction; straight from the British Medical Journal: Volume 323; page 295.

GUTS – Is arriving home late, after a night out with the lads, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the “Guts” to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?”

BALLS – Is coming home late after a night out with the lads, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bum and having the “Balls” to say: ‘You’re next, Chubby.’

I trust this clears up any confusion. Medically speaking, there is no difference in outcome; both are fatal.

To finish off I have a little Irish joke that I know you will love.

The judge says to a double-homicide defendant…

“You’re charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer.”

A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, “You bastard!”

The judge says, “You’re also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer.”

The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, “You rotten bastard!”

The judge stops and says to Paddy in the back of the courtroom. “Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at these crimes, but no more outbursts from you, or I’ll charge you with contempt. Is that understood?”

Paddy stands up and says, “I’m sorry, Your Honour, but for fifteen years I’ve lived next door to that arsehole, and every time I’ve asked to borrow a hammer, he’s said he didn’t have one.”  :lol_tb:  

Don’t forget there are lots of great sports jokes at my funny sports jokes category

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For this weeks Friday Funnies I just thought I would post some random funny moments to make you laugh. The first random funny moments is about a funny obituary.

Funny Moments #1

After losing his wife of 50 years the Yorkshire husband decides to pay for an obituary in the local paper.

The husband contacted the newspaper regarding an obituary. When informed of the cost, the man uttered, in true Yorkshire fashion, “How Much? !!!”

He reluctantly produced his wallet. “I want summit simple” he explained, “my Gladys was a good-hearted and hard-working Yorkshire lass but she wont ave wanted owt swanky.”

“Perhaps a small poem”, suggested the woman at the desk.

“Nay”, he said, “she wont ave wanted anything la-di-da, just put; ‘Gladys Braithwaite died'”.

“You need to say when”, he was told by the receptionist.

“Do I? Well, put died 17th March 2015. That’ll do”.

“It is usual for the bereaved to add some meaningful phrase about the dearly departed”.

The man considered for a moment. “Well, put in, ‘Sadly missed’. That’ll do”, he said.

“You can have another four words”, the woman explained.

“No, no”, he cried, “she wouldn’ ave wanted me to splash out”.

“The words are included in the price”, the woman informed him.

“Are they? You mean I’ve paid for ’em?”.

“Yes, indeed”.

“Well, if I’ve paid for ’em , I’m ‘avin them”.

The obituary was duly printed as follows:

Gladys Braithwaite died, 17th March 2015. Sadly missed. Also Tractor for sale.

What makes this funny for me is that I can actually see this happening!

Funny Moments #2

There were four final year senior students taking chemistry and all of them had an ‘A’ so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn’t make it back to Florida State until early Monday morning.

Rather than taking the final then, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final. The professor agreed they could make up the final the next day.

The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam.The next day the professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool, they thought! Each one, in a separate room, thought this was going to be easy … then they turned the page

On the second page was written…

For 95 points: Which tire? _________

Yeah, and they thought they were fooling their professor  :lol_ee:

Funny Moments #3

Coca-Cola funny moments

Don’t forget you can always get more laughs at my funny sports jokes category.

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For many people, the highlight of their weekend is being able to get together with a group of friends and see a movie. It seems like in recent years movie producers have gone the extra mile in making movies that are full of stunning visual effects and that tell a story that really captivates an audience. The whole idea of going to a movie theater, being able to sit down in a dark place, and totally get lost in the story is appealing. Everything from the design of the theater to the design of the seats is made to accomplish that goal. There are a lot of things that happen behind the scenes at a movie theater that most people know nothing about.

For example, when you walk into a movie theater, what is the first thing that hits you? Isn’t it the unbelievably powerful smell of the popcorn? But you have no doubt noticed that when you make popcorn at home, it smells nothing like what it does at the movie theater. There’s a reason for that. Movie theater popcorn has an additive that is designed to make the popcorn smell fill the entire theater. Remember, the goal of the theater is to immerse you in the movie viewing process. This includes getting you to purchase a large bucket of buttery popcorn.

Talking about buying popcorn, have you ever wondered why it costs seven dollars for a bucket of popcorn that you could pop at home for just a few cents? The answer is that movie theaters do not make the majority of their money from the actual movies that they show. In the first month or two of a screening, all of the money from ticket sales go back to the movie studio. Once the theaters have paid for the rights to show the movie, then they can start to collect a profit. So how do they make their money? You guessed it, by selling hot popcorn for $10.

So now you have your hot buttery popcorn and you’re sitting down at the theater waiting for the movie to start. And yet, doesn’t it always seem like the movie starts late? Well, they do. The idea is to give everyone enough time to sit down, enjoy a few trailers, and see the movie when it starts. Interestingly, movies always end on time. This way, the ushers know when to come in and clean.

Now, you will no doubt view your movie going experience a little bit differently. Nothing that happens at the theater is accidental. Everything from the theater casters used to move the projectors to the colors of the seats have been carefully crafted to give you the best movie going experience.

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About Peter Pelliccia"