Three Sons Joke Friday Funnies #363

Todays joke is called the three sons joke because, funny enough, it involves three sons. 😉It’s about a father who tries to teach his three sons the importance of learning from life’s experiences.

A Lesson From The Three Sons Joke

three sons joke

A man spoke to each of his 3 sons when he sent them off to college, “I feel I must provide you with the best possible education, and you do not owe me anything for that. However, I want you to appreciate it. As a token, please each put $1,000 into my coffin when I die.”

One of his sons became a doctor, another a lawyer and the other a financial planner. Each of his sons was very successful financially. When their father’s time had come, and they saw their father in the coffin, they remembered his wish.

First, the doctor put 10 newly printed crisp $100 bills onto the chest of the deceased.

Then, the financial planner also put $1,000 there in 20 newly printed crisp $50 bills.

Finally, it was the heartbroken lawyer’s turn. He reached into his pocket, took out his chequebook, wrote a check for $3,000, put it into his father’s coffin, and took the $2,000 cash.

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First Date Joke

This first date joke isn’t the funniest joke I’ve posted but because it’s a true story I thought it deserves mention

Funny First Date Joke

If you didn’t see this on the Tonight show, I hope you’re sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest first date joke ever, the first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates, but this takes the cake.

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience.

There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter…Snowing and quite cold… and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah .

It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that a fternoon.

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Elderly Humour Friday Funnies #358

I’ve written quite a few Elderly Jokes for Friday Funnies, and I see no reason why I shouldn’t add to my elderly humour posts. The first of my elderly humour stories is about an old couple in their seventies who are about to be married.

Elderly Humour #1

An elderly couple reaching their 70s are about to get married, but before they say their vows, the woman wanted to talk.
She said: “I want to keep my house.
He said: “That’s fine with me.”
She said: “I want to keep my Car.
He said: “That’s fine with me.”
She said: “And I want to have sex 6 times a week.
He said: “Put me down for Fridays.

Before my next elder humour joke I have a few elderly humour images.

elderly humour
elderly humour

Elderly Wisdom

This next bit of elderly humour is funny because the young of today have no idea what it used to be like.

Someone  asked the other day, ‘What was your favourite  ‘fast food’ when you were growing up?’

‘We didn’t have fast food when I was growing up,’ I  informed him. All the food was slow.’  

‘C’mon, seriously.. Where did you  eat?’  

‘It was a place called ‘home,” I explained.  !’Mum cooked every day and when Dad got home from work, we sat down together at the dining room table, and if I didn’t like what she put on my plate, I was allowed to sit there until I did like it.’

By this time, the lad was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious internal damage, so I didn’t tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table.

But here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I’d figured his system could have handled it: Some parents NEVER owned their own house, wore jeans,  set foot on a golf course, travelled out of the country or had a credit card.

My parents never drove me to school. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50 pounds, and only had one speed  (slow).

We didn’t have a television in our house until I was 10.

It was, of course, black and white,  and the station went off the air at 10 PM, after playing the national anthem and epilogue; it came back on the air at about 6 am. And there was usually a locally produced news and farm show on, featuring local people.

Pizzas were not delivered to our home. But milk was.

All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered newspapers 

Film stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the films. There were no movie ratings because all movies were responsibly produced for everyone to enjoy viewing, without profanity or violence or almost anything offensive.

If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you might want to share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren.  Just don’t blame me if they bust a gut laughing.

Growing up isn’t what it used to be, is it?

Finally, a couple more elderly humour images.

elderly humour
elderly humour

The fact that you’re here, reading this post, shows me you’re someone who loves, or is looking for laughs so don’t forget to check out my other Friday Funnies posts

You should also check out my Laughaholics Videos, especially my funniest Greek joke video. You’ll find heaps of funny videos there. You may even want to subscribe to my channel. I’m always looking for new subscribers.

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