Wife Jokes

This is my first wife jokes posts, and the reason for posting is to help promote my latest Laughaholics video, which is all about funny wife humour. Please, if you haven’t already seen it please take the time to watch my video as I’m sure you will get a kick out of it. While there, why not subscribe to my YouTube channel.

Wife Jokes Man Meets Wife In Heaven

Three men are outside Heaven’s gates waiting to be interviewed by St Peter before going through to Heaven. St Peter tells them “Your way across the bridge to Heaven all depends on the length of time and your faithfulness, to your last partner”.

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Friday Funnies #8 Who’s On First And The Girl Lodger

As Friday rolls by once again, I have the pleasure to present to you the latest in Friday’s Funnies series. I think you’re going to like this one as it has all the stuff that every good joke is made of, an unexpected punchline.

The Girl Lodger

A Scottish couple in a Hebridean croft took in an 18 year old girl as a lodger. The girl asked if she could take a bath, but the woman of the house explained that though they didn’t actually have a bath, she was welcome to use a tin bath in front of the fire.

“Monday’s the best night, when my husband goes out to darts” she said

The girl agreed to have a bath the following Monday.

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Scottish Jokes Friday Funnies Special

Friday Funnies has featured a lot of Irish jokes but only three Scottish ones. The first Scottish joke appeared in Friday Funnies #8 and was about a pretty lodger who was not able to grow any pubic hair.   :devil_tb:  

Friday Funnies #11 featured the second Scottish joke. This one was about a Scottish woman who learned a little trick which stopped her getting beaten up by her husband.

Then the third and final Scottish joke raised its kilt in  :wink:  Friday Funnies #21. This time the Scot featured in a video was having problems with Siri. That one was really funny. 

Best Ever Scottish Jokes

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Bar Jokes

For today’s Friday Funnies, I have a couple of bar Jokes. The first if my bar jokes is one of Sexy Sal’s blonde jokes but because it takes place in a bar I reckon it passes as one of my bar jokes.

Sexy Sal’s Blonde Bar Jokes

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The fastest thing Around

As another week goes by it seems my attempt at buying the winning lottery ticket online from one of my lottery sites has been a dismal failure. I’m not one to give up though, and I will continue to purchase my lottery tickets online until I get the winning one. After all, winning the lottery is not a race. One doesn’t win it by being the fastest thing on earth. Although, winning it does give you the capacity to buy something that you consider to be pretty damn fast, not to mention a beautiful piece of machinery. Something like the Bugatti Veyron Super Sport. Perhaps it isn’t the fastest thing in the world, but it’s the quickest car in the world, which brings me to this weeks Friday Funnies which is all about giving the right answer in an all-important job interview to get the job.

What Is The Fastest Thing?

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Duncan And Norm’s Big Day Out


This post is for all my Yankee mates that usually catch me out when they use an expression that only a fellow American would understand.  While we Aussies don’t tend to use this much slang in a normal conversation I think it’s a real shame because we are losing a great part of our heritage. So, without further ado I present to you, Duncan and Norm, a couple of true blue Aussies.

This is a yarn about two mates who lived back of Bourke. Though one of them was a Banana Bender, Duncan, and the other an Apple eater, Norm, they were both real ocker sorts, and their relationship was simply ace. They never got aggro with each other and loved a bit of the ol’ Amber fluid.

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Crocodile Jokes

This week’s Friday Funnies focuses on a few crocodile jokes, which has to be a Friday Funnies first.

A Blonde’s Crocodile Shoes

A blonde was on holiday and driving through Darwin. She desperately wanted to take home

a pair of genuine crocodile shoes but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle on prices” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, “Well then, maybe I’ll just go out and catch a crocodile myself so that I can get a pair of shoes for free”.

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An Irish Miracle Friday Funnies

Yep, it’s time for this weeks Friday Funnies. Once again it’s going to be a hilarious Irish joke. It wasn’t quite what I expected in a joke, but it’s funny all the same. This one is all about an Irish miracle.

Murphy’s Irish Miracle

Murphy drops some buttered toast on the kitchen floor, and it lands butter-side-up. He looks down in astonishment, for he knows that it’s a law of nature of the universe that buttered toast always falls butter-down. So he rushes round to the presbytery to fetch Father Flanagan.

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Stuff That Makes You Laugh

Friday Funnies is all about stuff that makes you laugh. Hopefully, this weeks stuff that makes you laugh is so funny you will want to share it with all your friends. Simply, click on one of the social icons over there on your left.

Stuff That Makes You Laugh Images

OK, now for a hilarious joke about group therapy.

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with five young mothers & their small children.

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Funny Widow Joke

Hey guys, I’ve just posted my latest Laughaholics video, Funny Rancher’s Widow Joke and clicking on that link will take you to the video, or you can read the funny widow joke here. 😏

A Funny Widow Joke Rancher Style

Alright, there was this rancher who died, and he leaves everything to his wife who happened to be beautiful, strong of mind and determined, and she was determined to keep the ranch. But, not knowing anything about ranching she put an ad in the paper to hire a runch-hand.

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