There Is No Way In Hell That A Man Can Please A Woman

Why a post called There Is No Way In Hell That A Man Can Please A Woman? Ages ago, I remember reading a post by Darren Rowse about how resurrecting old posts could be a good thing. They buried it in the archives, so it took me a while to find it. The post was called The Why And How Of Repeating Content On Your Blog. He wrote it in response to a question from one of his readers. It’s a pretty good read, and I suggest you go on over and take a look at it.

One of the methods that Darren uses is to revisit an old post, update the information and then change the date so that it appears as a new post. Which is all well and good, but I much prefer to find a post from one of my other blogs and then migrate it another blog of my choice, one of the many benefits of having multiple blogs. In this way, I can see what sort of effect it would have on a completely different audience.

There Is No Way In Hell That A Man Can Please A Woman

There Is No Way In Hell That A Man Can Please A Woman

The following is a post I did on my What A Load Of Bullsh@t Blog, which no longer exists. Naturally enough I called it, It’s Bullsh@t The Way Women Treat Men. I must say that it did create a bit of a stir and I am waiting with bated breath to see the reaction it will have with a new target audience. So, without further ado, I present to my WassupBlog Audience the reposted version, ‘There Is No Way In Hell That A Man Can Please A Woman ‘.

Let’s face it guys; us poor blokes have got to be the underdogs when it comes to the way the so-called ‘weaker sex’ treat us. Sorry girls, I don’t care what you say, it’s damn hard being a man. Shit, what chance have we got when women have it all over us?

Everyone sees men as being the protectors of women. That all changed after women starting burning their bras. Now, we have to be extremely careful about what we do or even say. 

If we put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, we’re considered a male chauvinist pig. If we stay at home and do the housework, we’re a bloody pansy. If we work too hard trying to give them the lifestyle they have come to expect, then we are selfish and uncaring because we don’t have any time for her and the kids. Hell, I would rather spend time with them, but then I would get my arse kicked because I am not providing for their every need.

If, on the other hand, we don’t work hard enough, we’re good for nothing layabout. If we have a tedious, repetitive job with low pay, we should get off our asses and find something better. If a man gets a promotion ahead of her, then that is favouritism, but if she gets promotion ahead of a man, that is equal opportunity.

Women And The Workforce

The workplace is a minefield ready to explode in regards to the way we handle ourselves around women. If we mention how nice she looks, that is sexual harassment, if we keep quiet, that is typical male indifference.

Women And The Home

Shit, it doesn’t get any better when we get home either, as we still have to take care of what we say or do. If we cry, we’re a sheila; if we don’t, we’re an insensitive bastard. If a man thumps her, that’s wife bashing. If she whacks him, that’s self-defence. If he decides without consulting her, he’s a chauvinist; if she decides without regard for his feelings, then she’s a liberated woman. If he asks her to do something she doesn’t enjoy that is domination, if she asks him, its a favour.

Women And The Sexual revolution

If we appreciate the female form and sexy underwear, we’re sexual perverts; if we don’t notice, we’re poofters. If we like a woman to keep in shape and shave her legs, that is sexist, if we don’t care that is unromantic. If we try to keep ourselves in shape, that is vanity; if we don’t, we’re slobs.

If we buy flowers, we’re after something; if we don’t, we’re forgetful. If we are proud of our achievements, we’re up ourselves, if we aren’t we’re not ambitious. If we happen to ask for a cuddle, we’re accused of only wanting sex. If we’re too tired after a bad day at the office, then we never give a stuff about other people’s needs.

If she has a headache, its because she is tired. If he has a headache, its because he doesn’t love her anymore. 

If we want it too often, we’re oversexed; if we can’t perform on cue, there must be someone else. If we tell the truth, “Honey does this dress make my ass look big?”, we’re bastards, if we don’t then we will get it in the end after the party and some so-called girlfriend commented on her poor choice of clothes.

I tell you gals; it’s bloody hard being a man. 

That was it, and it offended some of the gals out there who couldn’t see it for what it truly was, a poor bloke’s attempt at satire. 😆

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This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Steve

    Brilliant!! This really did make me actually laugh out loud. I hope it is received as intended, a very amusing and harmless bit of fun.

    1. Peter

      Hey Steve, I’m glad you got it and appreciated the post mate. Let’s hope others will as well. 😁

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