Senior Humour Friday Funnies #345

Todays Friday Funnies is about senior humour. I've written a lot of seniors jokes, and they always go down well. One of my favourite bit of senior humour would have to be Senior Jokes Friday Funnies #128. Todays senior humour take place in a courtroom after a senior was caught stealing a can of peaches. Senior Humour The Shoplifter A cranky old woman in her so-called "senior years" was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store.  This old duck gave everyone a hard time, including the store manager, the security guard and the arresting officer who took her away.  She didn't stop complaining, the whole she was in custody and criticized everything and everyone throughout the process. When she finally appeared before the judge, the judge asked her what she had stolen from the store. The senior citizen defiantly replied, "Just a stupid can of peaches, you old fool." The judge then asked why she had done it. "I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store," she huffed. The judge asked how many peaches were in the can. She replied in a nasty tone, "Nine! But why do you care about that?" The judge answered patiently, "Well, ma'am, because I'm going to give you nine days in jail -- one day for each peach." As the judge was about to drop his gavel, the lady's long-suffering husband raised his hand slowly and asked if he might speak. The judge said, "Yes sir, what do you have to add?"…

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Senior Citizens Jokes Friday Funnies #162

This is my 162nd Friday Funnies post! I never thought I would be able to keep it going that long  :drunk_tb: Way back at Friday Funnies #111 I wrote a series of Elderly Jokes. I thought it was time to do another one but this time, for SEO reasons  :cheesey: I'm going to call it senior citizens jokes.  Senior Citizen Jokes That Make You Laugh Senior Citizen Joke #1: Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one gentleman, a senior citizen, already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet. He insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him. 'I don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.' Senior Citizen Joke #2: A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: 'So I hear you're getting married?' 'Yep!' 'Do I know her?' 'Nope!' 'This  woman, is she good looking?' 'Not really.' 'Is she a good cook?' 'Naw, she can't cook too well.' 'Does she have lots of money?' 'Nope! Poor as a church mouse.' 'Well, then, is she good in bed?' 'I don't know.' 'Why in the world do you want to marry her then?' 'Because she can still drive!' I know they say priorities change when you become a senior citizen but come on,…

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