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Irish Jokes Day Friday Funnies #251

 

Today is Irish Jokes Day. Not for any special reason except I know how much you guys would love an Irish jokes day. I know it would be better on St. Patrick’s Day but I honestly can’t wait that long :wink_ee:

Friday Funnies Irish Jokes Day

Our first Irish Jokes day joke involves the ever popular Murphy the Irishman.
Murphy goes to his friend Pat and says, “I’m sleeping with the Pastors wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after services for me?”

Pat doesn’t like it, but being Murphy’s longtime friend, he agrees.

After the service, he starts talking to the Pastor, asking him all sorts of  stupid questions, just to keep him occupied.

Finally the Pastor gets annoyed and asks Pat what he’s really up to.

Pat, feeling guilty, finally confesses to the Pastor. “My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied.”

The Pastor smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Pat’s shoulder and says, “My Son you’d better hurry home. My wife died two years ago.”

Irish Jokes Day

Did you ever hear the one about the Irish priest that got pulled over by the police? It goes something like this…..

An Irish priest driving along a country road gets pulled over by the police. He immediately smells alcohol on the priest’s breath and notices an empty wine bottle in the car.

He says: “Have you been drinking?”

“Just water,” says the priest.

The cop replies: “Then why do I smell wine?”

The priest looks at the bottle and says: “Good Lord! He’s done it again!”

Irish Jokes Day 2

Irishman, like the rest of us, have all types of jobs. There are even Irish doctors! Man, I’m not sure I could live with having an Irish doctor :tongue_laugh_ee:

Dr O’Mahony tells his patient: “I have bad news and worse news, John.”

“Oh dear,” John replies. “What’s the bad news?” asks the patient.

The doctor replies: “You only have 24 hours to live.”

“That’s terrible,” says the patient. “How can the news possibly be worse?”

Dr O’Mahony replies: “I’ve been trying to contact you since yesterday.”

And so ends another Friday Funnies. Sure hope you enjoyed it enough to share it with your friends :smoke_tb:

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Irish Funnies Friday Funnies #250

Man I really love that Friday Funnies has been around for so long. Out of all my blogs the Friday Funnies post is the one I most look forward to. Today’s Friday Funnies is #250 and once again I’m going to visit the ever popular Irish Funnies.

Irish Doctor Irish Funnies

A doctor in Dublin wanted to get  off work and go fishing, so he approached his  assistant

“Murphy, I am going fishing  tomorrow and don’t want to close the clinic. I want you to  take care of the clinic and take care of all me  patients”.

“Yes, sir!” answers  Murphy.

The doctor goes fishing and  returns the following day and asks: “So,Murphy, how was  your day?”

Murphy told him that he took care  of three patients. “The first one had a headache so he did,  so I gave him Paracetamol.”

“Bravo Murphy lad, and the second  one?” asks the doctor.

“The second one had indigestion  and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir” says  Murphy.

“Bravo, bravo! You’re good at this  and what about the third one?” asks the doctor.

“Sir, I was sitting here and  suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman bursts in so she does. Like a bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, taking off everyting including her bra and her knickers and lies down on the table, spreading  her legs and shouts:

‘HELP ME for the love of St Patrick!  For five years I have not seen a man!’

“Tunderin’ lard Jesus Murphy, what  did you do?” asks the  doctor.

“I put drops in her eyes.”

Yeah, you just have to love those Irish Funnies.

How about this one that I created with The Creator?

Irish Funnies

I have to admit I love The Creator! It’s allowed me to create most of my own images which appear on Google’s image search bringing me a whole lot of traffic.

One I didn’t create is the one below which I found in a Daily Mail article. It’s one of many funny pub signs a lot of which would fit nicely with my Irish Funnies post.

Friday Funnies Irish Funnies

As always, I hope you’ve enjoyed this weeks Friday Funnies and that you share the laughs with your friends. Just use your favourite social media below.

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