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Stuff That Makes You Laugh Friday Funnies #286

Friday Funnies is all about stuff that makes you laugh. Before I get into some of that stuff that makes you laugh I have to apologise for missing last weeks Friday Funnies. No excuse except that I was flat out doing other things and just didn’t have the time. Hopefully this weeks stuff that makes you laugh is so funny it will make up for missing out on last weeks post.

Stuff That Makes You Laugh Images

stuff that makes you laugh

I think this next image is hilarious.

stuff that makes you laugh

OK, now for a really funny joke about group therapy.

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with five young mothers &   their small children.

You all have obsessions, he stated. I am concerned that these individual obsessions are going to impact your children.

To the first mother, Mary, he said: You are obsessed with eating. You’ve even named your daughter Candy.

He turned to the second Mum, Ann: Your obsession is with money. It manifests itself in your children’s names, Penny, Goldie and Frank. 

He then turned to the third Mum, Joyce: Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your children’s names: Brandy and Sherry. You even called the cat, Whisky.

Next he turns to the fourth Mum, June: Your obsession is with flowers. Your girls are called Rose, Daphne & Poppy.                    

At this point, the fifth  mother, Kathy, quietly gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispered: Come on Dick, this guy has no idea what he’s talking about. Grab Fanny Cocky and Willy, we’re going.

The next joke is an Irish joke which I find really funny.

An Irishman was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a full day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.”

When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly 60 POUNDS! Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said, “Did you follow my instructions?”

The Irishman nodded…”I’ll tell yah though, by Jaesuz, I t’out I were goin’ to drop dead on dat 3rd day.

“From hunger, you mean?”

“No,” said the Irishman. “From all the skippin’.”

Finally, I’m going to finish off with the funniest Super Bowl commercials for 2017.

Remember, you can get more laughs by checking out the Friday Funnies category by heading over to my funny sports jokes.

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Funny Images And Videos Friday Funnies #252

Funny Images That Make You Laugh

For today’s Friday Funnies I thought I would post some funny images and videos. Some of the funny images were put together with the aid of The Creator.

The first of the funny images is one of Myla the Mini Dachshund, my daughter and her partners little baby.

Funny Dachshund funny image

The photo was taken yesterday during the Australia Day celebrations. Luckily for Myla they hadn’t actually fired up the barbie yet. Myla is the funniest pup out there. If you love dachshunds you should visit Myla’s Instagram page by clicking the link above.

The next of my funny images is a little late as far as Christmas is concerned but I love it because it has a go at our politicians and has a lot of truth to it. :tongue_laugh_ee:

Funny Images

I had a funny thing happen to me today. I was sitting on a bench next to a homeless man, I asked him how he ended up this way.

He said:   “Up until this last week, I still had it all !!! A cook cooked my meals, my room was cleaned, my clothes were washed, pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV, Internet, I went to the gym, the pool, the library, I could still go to school. . … ”

I asked him,   “What happened?  Drugs?   Alcohol?   Divorce?”

“Oh No, nothing like that” he said, “No, no … I just got out of prison !”

Funny Videos

Now for the first of my funny videos.

That video is funny because women are supposed to be so bloody good at multi-tasking. :hey_you:

I love the next video, partly because it has a really hot sheila in it but mainly because its so bloody funny. It’s actually a commercial.

Finally, the last of the funny images.

I hope you enjoyed these funny images enough to share them with your friends.

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Funny Images Friday Funnies #245

They say that picture image is worth a thousand words. This weeks Friday Funnies is going to have some really funny images in it.

Take this first one for example. I got it in an email with the following text. I found this old school picture
I am not sure of the year exactly and I don’t know who everyone is, but I am about 99% sure that   you are in the back row on the right.

Funny Images

Perhaps you know someone you can prank with that photo? :tongue_laugh_ee:

Then there is this one that I put together with the help of the Creator.

funny images cowboy

Which brings to mind this joke I knew back in my school days.

It started with this young bloke, barely in his teens, who had to buy some condoms. He goes up to the cashier and says, “Excuse me miss, but I need a packet of f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f, I really need some f-f-f-f-f-straws! Yes, that’s it I need a packet of straws.

The cashier sells him the straws and then writes something in her notebook.

Only minutes later this guy comes back in again. “Excuse me miss, I really need some f-f-f-f-, could I have some f-f-f-f-f..tweezers please. Yep, I really need some tweezers.

The cashier sells him some tweezers and again writes something in her notebook.

Meanwhile the kid is outside trying to drum up his final shreds of courage. He strides back in, goes right up to the sexy cashier and tries for the final time. “Excuse me miss, I would like a packet of f-f-f-f–, shit! I really would like a packet of FRANGERS! Yes, that’s it, I need a packet of frangers.

The cashier sells him the condoms and then writes condoms in the list she was making. She looks at the list, scratches her head and says, “Poor guy, he doesn’t know if he wants to suck it, pluck it or f@#%K it.”

And for our final image, which isn’t funny in itself but as a meme…

online shopping

Don’t forget to share this post around so you can brighten up your friends day.

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Funny Shit To Make You Laugh Friday Funnies #227

In case you’re wondering why I’ve called this post funny shit is because it’s just another keyword that I’m targeting. Some of you may think I’m crazy because it may piss Google off! Well, as this Too Sexy For Google post will tell you, I now longer care about the Google moral police.

So, in the hope that there are people out there searching for funny shit I’ve decided to call Friday Funnies #227 Funny Shit To Make You Laugh!

Some Funny Shit To Make You Laugh

Have you ever wondered why it’s just not smart to give women shit? I think William Golding said it best when he said….

funny shit to make you laugh

Do you remember the old saying, If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Well, I found a completely different way to look at it.  :tongue_laugh_ee:

more funny shit to make you laugh

Then there’s this image of some funny shit at the Rio Olympics because of the Russian Olympic team.

funny shit Rio Olympics

Here’s something I put together with help from The Creator.

more really funny shit

To continue with some more really funny shit I’ve included something that may well have taken place in a mortuary.

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces.  The coroner calls the police to tell them his results after the examination.  “First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector”, says the Coroner.

“Second body: “Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile.”

The Inspector asked, “What of the third body?”

“Ah,” says the coroner, “This is the most unusual one. Paddy from Belfast, 30, struck by lightning.”

“Why is he smiling then?” inquires the Inspector.

“Thought he was having his picture taken.”

Yeah, it just happened to be an Irishman didn’t it.  :smoke_tb:


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