Doctor Jokes Friday Funnies #374

Hey guys, welcome to today’s Friday Funnies post about doctor jokes. Today’s doctor jokes post, as all my Fridays Funnies are, is thanks to the many jokes emails I receive daily.

The Cardiologist Doctor Jokes

A Lexus mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of an LS460 when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was waiting for the service manager to have a look at his car. The mechanic shouted to the waiting, cardiologist, “Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?”

The cardiologist, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a dirty rag and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired or replaced anything damaged, and then put everything back in, and when I finished, it worked just like new.

So how is it that I make $48,000 a year and you make $1.7M when you and I are doing the same work?”

The cardiologist paused, leaned over, and then whispered to the mechanic, “Try doing it while the engine is running”.

doctor jokes

Doctor Jokes And The Elderly

There are times when, as a patient, for whatever reason, you misinterpret what the doctor has been saying to you. Patients misinterpreting their doctors happens a lot when the patients are elderly. Take the next joke as a prime example.

Morris, an 82-year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.

A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said: “You’re doing great, aren’t you?”

Morris replied: “Just doing what you said, Doc. Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.”

The doctor said: “I didn’t say that. I said, You’ve got a heart murmur – be careful.”

You May Find The Following Of Interest

Check out my Laughaholics jokes so you can keep the laughs coming. You’ll especially love my latest Funny Blonde jokes video. While you’re there why not join my growing YouTube Channel. As you know I’m always looking for new subscribers so why not consider subscribing to my My Bonzer Channel

If you ever wondered how to remove a background from an image you should watch my Removing the background with InPixio Photo Clip.

Of course, you know you can always get more laughs at my Friday Funnies posts, not to mention my Heaps Of Jokes.

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Gynaecologist Jokes Friday Funnies #188

There was a Friday Funnies post way back in December of 2104 about a beautiful women that centred around a gynaecologist. Just as funny situations likely occur in every profession, the case is also true for gynaecologists. Today’s Friday Funnies is going to add to those funny gynaecologist jokes.

Gynaecologist Jokes You’ll Love

Our first gynaecologist Joke is about a man who went to a Wickham Terrace Specialist in Brisbane answering an advert for a Gynaecologist Assistant. Knowing that nowadays, job advertisers aren’t able to discriminate against the applicant’s gender, he was very interested, so he went in and asked the secretary for details.

She retrieved the file and Read to him: “This job entails preparing ladies for the Gynaecologist. You will be responsible for helping them out of their underwear, laying them down and carefully washing their private areas, applying shaving foam to the necessary parts and removing all unwanted foliage, and finally, you’ll be required to rub in soothing oils, in preparation for the Gynaecologist’s examination.”

Then she told him “The annual salary is $65,000 and if you’re interested, you’ll have to go
to Gympie “.

“My goodness!”, exclaimed the man, “Is that where the job is?”.

She answered, “No , that’s where the end of the queue is…”

gynaecologist jokes

Most people would think that being a gynaecologist would be a pretty safe job, right? Well, like this next Gynaecologist jokes goes to show that all depends on the patient.

A biker’s hot girlfriend goes to the gynecologist for a physical. When the gyno starts examining her, it turns out she’s a nymphomaniac. Everywhere he probes or touches makes her moan suggestively. After awhile, not able to contain himself any longer, he rips off his clothes and has her right there on the examining room table.

Meanwhile, the biker get suspicious of all the commotion and barges into the room.

“What the hell are you doing?” he shouts.

“I’m–uhhh–checking her temperature,” stammers the gyno.

“OK, doc, go ahead,” growls the biker taking out his switchblade, “but if that thing doesn’t have numbers on it when you pull it out, it’s coming off!”

Naturally our gynaecologist jokes has to include a gynaecologist with a sadistic sense of humour  :devil_tb:

A woman goes to her gynaecologist who verifies that she is pregnant. As this was her first pregnancy the gynaecologist asks her if she has any questions.

She replies, “Well, I’m a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?”

The doctor answered, “Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it’s difficult to describe pain.”

“I know, but can’t you give me some idea?,” she asks.

“OK, grab your upper lip and pull it out a little…”

“Like this?”

“A little more…”

“Like this?”

“No. A little more…”

“Like this?”

“Yes. Does that hurt?”

“A little bit.”

“Now stretch it over your head!”

Yeah, you just have to love those gynaecologist jokes! And so ends another Friday Funnies. Remember, make sure your friends don’t miss out by sharing this post with them.  :drunk_tb:

Have a great weekend guys and don’t forget where you can find some really funny sports jokes!

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