Todays Friday Funnies is about six types of sex, a far cry from my first ever Friday Funnies. Although I must admit, that initial post did mention sex at least once. 🤩So, what are the six types of sex? I’m glad you asked. 😆
The Six Types Of Sex
1. Pension Sex
Two men were talking. “So, how’s your sex life?”
“Oh, nothing special. I’m having Pension sex.”
“Yeah, you know, I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!”
2. Loud Sex
A wife went in to see a therapist and said, “I’ve got a big problem, doctor.
Every time we’re in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell.”
“My dear,” the shrink said. “That’s completely natural. I don’t see what the problem is.
“The problem is,” she complained. “It wakes me up!”
3. Quiet Sex
Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, “How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?”
She glanced at him and replied, “You’re never home!”
4. Argument Sex
A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.
The husband yelled. “When you die, I’m getting you a headstone that reads:
‘Here Lies My Wife – Cold as Ever.'”
“Yeah,” she replies. “When you die, I’m getting you a headstone that reads:
‘Here Lies My Husband – Stiff, at Last.'”
5. Women’s Humorous Sex
My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, “This will make you happy tonight.” He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs.
He couldn’t get back in.
6. Elderly Sex
One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo and found her 97-year-old husband in bed with another woman.
She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor, assisted living apartment, killing him instantly.
Brought before the court on the charge of murder, the judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defence.
She began coolly, ‘Yes, your honour. I figured that at 97 if he could still have sex…he could also probably fly.
And there you have it my gentle readers, the six types of sex.
Finally, something I put together with The Creator.