Before I get to our Friday Funnies, did you know that eBay has some great deals on joke books and stuff?
Lets face it jokes about seniors make you laugh. I’m sure most times when seniors make you laugh that it’s not entirely what they intended. It’s just that they do stuff for whatever reason and some folks out there find it incredibly funny. I’ve done a lot of Senior Citizens Jokes including Friday Funnies #162 and Friday Funnies #45 Senior Citizens & Sexy Pranks and they’ve always gone down really well. Which is why I’m adding another Seniors Make You Laugh jokes to the collection.
Seniors Make You Laugh Stuff They Go Through
The other day I went over to our nearby Pharmacy. When I got there, I went straight to the back of the store to where the Pharmacists’ Counter is located and took out my little brown bottle along with a teaspoon and laid them both onto the counter.
The pharmacist came over smiled and asked if he could help me. I said, “Yes! Could you please taste this for me?”
Being I’m a senior citizen … I guess the Pharmacist just went along with me and picked up the spoon and put a tiny bit of the liquid on his tongue and swilled it around.
Then with a stomach-churning look on his face he spit it out on the floor and began coughing.
When he finally was finished, I looked him right in the eye and asked, “Now, does that taste sweet to you?”
The pharmacist, shaking his head back and forth with a venomous look in his eyes yelled, “HELL NO!!!”
So I said, “Oh thank God! That’s a real relief! My doctor told me to get a pharmacist to test my urine for sugar!”
Well, I can never go back to that Pharmacy but I really don’t care though, because they just aren’t very friendly there anyway.
Yep, seniors have been around long enough that they know how to make people pay for shit that happens to them in the past.
Seniors Make You Laugh When Eyesight Dims
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn’t do something useful with my time.
“Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine is not a good thing?” I asked.
Her talking about my “doing-something-useful” seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She was “only thinking of me”, she said and suggested that I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the girls.
I did this and when I got home last night, I decided to play a trick on her. I e-mailed her and told her that I had joined a Parachute Club.
She replied, “Are you nuts? You are 78 years old and now you’re going to start jumping out of airplanes?”
I told her that I even got a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.
She immediately telephoned me and yelled, “Good grief, Mum, where are your glasses? This is a Membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club.”
“Oh dear. I’m in trouble again,” I said, “I really don’t know what to do. I signed up for five jumps a week!!”
The line went quiet and her friend picked up the phone and said that my daughter had fainted.
Life as a Senior Citizen is not getting any easier, but sometimes it can be ever so much fun.
Yeah, I’m sure that there are a lot of seniors out there who would laugh out loud at that one.
Seniors make You Laugh Hot And Cold Sex
And finally we have a senior who goes to the doctor.
After his exam the doctor asked the elderly man: “You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?”
“In fact, I do,” said the old man. “After I have sex with my wife, I am usually cold and chilly, and then, after I have sex with her the second time, I am usually hot and sweaty.”
Later, after examining the man’s elderly wife, the doctor said: “Everything appears to be fine. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?”
She replied that she had no questions or concerns.
The doctor then said to her: “Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually cold and chilly after having sex with you the first time, and then hot and sweaty after the second time. Do you know why?”
“Oh that crazy old fart,” she replied. “That’s because the first time is usually in January and the second time is in August.”
And so ends another Friday Funnies. Don’t forget you can get more sports jokes at my sports site. Also you can find some great bargains at my brand new Top Shopping store.