Scottish Jokes Friday Funnies Special

Friday Funnies has featured a lot of Irish jokes but only three Scottish ones. The first Scottish joke appeared in Friday Funnies #8 and was about a pretty lodger who was not able to grow any pubic hair.   :devil_tb:  

Friday Funnies #11 featured the second Scottish joke. This one was about a Scottish woman who learned a little trick which stopped her getting beaten up by her husband.

Then the third and final Scottish joke raised its kilt in  :wink:  Friday Funnies #21. This time the Scot featured in a video was having problems with Siri. That one was really funny. 

Best Ever Scottish Jokes

Scottish Jokes
Featured in Funniest British Postcards

A young Scottish lad and lass were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands, gazing out over the loch.

For several minutes they sat silently.

Then finally the girl looked at the boy and said, “A penny for your thoughts, Angus.”

“Well, eh, I was thinkin’… perhaps it’s aboot time for a wee kiss.”
The girl blushed, then leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek.
Then he blushed. The two turned once again to gaze out over the loch.

Minutes passed and the girl spoke again. “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
“Well, eh, I was thinkin’ perhaps it’s noo aboot time for a wee cuddle.”

The girl blushed, then leaned over and cuddled him for a few seconds. Then he blushed. And the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch.

After a while, she again said, “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
“Well, eh, I was thinkin’ perhaps it’s aboot time you let me put my hand on your leg.”

The girl blushed, then took his hand and put it on her knee. Then he blushed. Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch before the girl spoke again.

“Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.” The young man glanced down with a furrowed brow.

“Well, noo,” he said, ‘my thoughts are a wee bit more serious this time.’

“Really?” said the lass in a whisper, filled with anticipation.

“Aye,” said the lad, nodding.
 
The girl looked away in shyness, began to blush, and bit her lip in anticipation of the ultimate request when he said, “Dae ye no think it’s aboot time ye paid me the first three pennies????

best Scottish jokes

The Birth Of The Kilt Scottish Joke

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If you ever wondered how to remove a background from an image you should watch my Removing the background with InPixio Photo Clip.

Of course, you know you can always get more laughs at my Friday Funnies posts, not to mention my Heaps Of Jokes.

Jokes aside I reckon you’ll like my latest video Luminar 4 Review which show just how easy it is to replace a dull sky for a truly dramatic one in your photos.

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