Public Service Friday Funnies #167

It’s been a pretty hard week but I always make sure I have enough time to come up with a Friday Funnies post. Today’s Friday Funnies is #167 which means I’ve been doing these posts for over two years. I reckon that’s a pretty good milestone. Truth be told I never thought I’d be able to keep these jokes going for so long. But I’m so glad I have and I plan to keep them coming.

Usually people working for the public service are considered to have a pretty cushy and secure jobs. Unfortunately working for the public service isn’t as safe as it used to be. The following joke tries to poke a bit of fun at those working for the public service.

Public Service Employee Notice For Older People

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much
SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of SHIT they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your MP, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

PS – Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off

Talk about looking at the funny side of acronyms  :tongue_laugh_ee:

Now for some funny images that have nothing to do with the public service although I’m sure they’ve passed many of these through internal emails.  :thumbup_ee:

Mmm, I wonder if those public servants will take up her offer?  :no_way:

public service

The bottom image isn’t really that accurate, she online needs one excuse, the old headache one.  :lol_ee:  

101 positions

Yep, lets see them explain that one to the kids.

adult blow

You would think et old guy would know all about gravity wouldn’t you?

sagging

That’s it guys. I hope you liked this weeks Friday Funnies. Have a great weekend and don’t forget to share this post with your mates.

Oh, if you’re looking for more jokes don’t forget my funny sports jokes.

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Peter Pelliccia

I'm an Aussie blogger who loves to blog and share everything that I've learned on my blogging journey, including blogging tips and ways to blog for money. I am also trying to make my way on YouTube. You can follow my progress by subscribing to My Bonzer Channel.

This Post Has 4 Comments

  1. this last joke just killed it…. Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off….. me like

  2. LOL…The last one was too much funny…Made me laugh for an hour. They sure remember the days when they both were young…QUite enjoying onesfor sure :D

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