How fortunate was I to have run into Maddy Cuttsworth, one of Google’s big boys, and to have him agree to an interview. How lucky are you, my loyal readers, to have access to this exclusive interview with one of the most famous faces behind the huge Google machine.
Naturally, once I got him on his own I wanted to grill him, to learn as much as I could about what Google sees as important as far as PR updates are concerned.
Exclusive Interview With Maddy Cuttsworth
Sire: First let me welcome you to WassupBlog, I’m sure my readers are waiting with baited breath to learn all that they can from you Maddy. Before we start, how’s the cappuccino? Does the fact it’s laced with truth serum affecting the taste at all?
Maddy: Truth serum?
Sire: Never mind that Maddy, let’s get on with the interview shall we? I’m sure my readers would like to know what Google considers important when handing out it’s PR. Take dofollow vs nofollow, for example, is it true that Google would penalize dofollow blogs.
Maddy: Nope, sure Google would like people to believe that Google would frown on dofollow blogs as it upsets the figures collected by our bots, but it’s all too hard to monitor so we don’t bother with it. It’s enough that we spread the rumors that it could harm their ranking and then we let bloggers willing to spread the rumor run with it.
Sire: So, are you saying that when I posted The Myth That Dofollow Leaches Your PR, I the nail right on the head?
Maddy: (frowning) Yeah, we weren’t at all happy when we saw that.
Sire: OK. Most people would agree that a blog’s PR should reflect the quality of the content as well as the popularity of the blog itself. Would you agree with that?
Maddy: Yes, of course.
Sire: Well then, can you tell me why my What A Load Of Bullshit blog has never gone above PR0, especially considering it is both popular and has good content?
Maddy: It’s because of the name of the blog. Google does not like profanity.
Sire: So you’re saying it’s because Google does not like the word bullshit. Don’t you realize that bullshit is NOT a dirty word? So you’re trying to tell me if the site was called What A Load Of Cow Manure, it would have a better PR even though the former name would be more accurate?
Maddy: Well yes.
Sire: Seems to me that Google is a bit up itself, but let’s move on shall we? I and a lot of others have noticed that the A Listers of the world tend to have a higher PR even though their blog posts are no better than many of the other bloggers out there. Why is that?
Maddy: I think I can safely say it’s because they do all the right things to make Google happy.
Sire: Oh, so it’s not all about content, it’s just that they are so far up Google’s ass that Google rewards them. Seems a little biased wouldn’t you say?
Maddy: Well yes, but how else can we get people to conform to what we want?
Sire: So Google is more into conformity than it is about quality? Now, let’s tackle those bloggers who have been Google Slapped because they decided to do paid tasks or accept paid links on their blogs. Why is that?
Maddy: Well, it upsets our statistics so we let it be known that we don’t like it.
Sire: So it has nothing to do with the fact that it also affects your bottom line?
Maddy: Yes, that too.
Sire: So once again PR is more than just ranking a site on quality it’s also about making sure they once again conform to Google’s rules.
Maddy: Why am I all tied up, and who the hell are you?
Sire: Oops, looks like you’re all out of cappuccino there Maddy. Reckon that concludes our little interview. Thanks so much for being part of Wassup for today.