Friday Funnies # 34, Crocodiles, Old Women & Aunty Acid

Man, you got to love it when the work week goes by and you have the weekend to look forward too. Then of course, thanks to yours truly  :smoke_tb: , you also have Friday Funnies to look forward to. As usual I’ve taken the time to find a nice selection of jokes and as usual I’m hoping they all go over well.

With this weeks Fridays Funnies I have to warn you that there’s going to be some swear words in the following story, so if you think you may be offended, do yourself a favor and do not read beyond this point.

This letter was sent to the Lions Bay School Principal’s office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for seniors. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door prize and was writing to say thank you.

Dear Lions Bay School ,

God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent Senior Citizens luncheon I am 91 years old and live at the Trafalgar Square Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone and I want to thank you for the kindness shown to a forgotten old lady. My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio; but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping.

The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I told her to fuck off.

Thank you for that opportunity.

Sincerely,

Joan

Mmm, seems that for some old age just helps to make you bitter. Joan, you are a bad girl  :tongue_laugh_ee:

The Canadian Crocodile Attack

After last weeks fly eating bullfrogs I thought I’d give you something a little bigger.

You’re going to love this little prank!  :thumbup_tb:

Aunty Acid And Men Cartoon

Oh Auntie Acid, you really love to stick it to us men don’t you luv? Never mind, cos we can handle it and we loves ya ll the same.

 Aunty Acid And Men

That’s it guys. I hope you liked  this weeks Fridays Funnies and I wish you all a great week end.

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Honeymooning Cousins & Sheep Shearing In Australia

I’m sure that being the observant readers that you are you would have noticed that for the past three weeks I’ve only been posting my Friday Funnies posts. Well, if you were one of my list subscribers you would have known that I’ve been busy entertaining some cousins from Italy who were over from Italy. They were actually on their honeymoon and had decided to spend it with their family, which I found to be quite an honor.

Naturally we wanted to show them a good time and I have to admit we found it to be quite a challenge. Luckily my Scenic Adelaide blog was able to provide me with some places to take them too. Even though spending so much time with them was pretty tiring we enjoyed every bit of it as it allowed us to come to know them so much better, something you can’t do from technological advances like Skype or FaceBook.

Learning To Shear A Sheep

Naturally, knowing something about the person helps you to work out the sort of places

English: shearing a sheep at the Shearing Shed...

Shearing a sheep at the Shearing Shed

that they would find interesting. As it turns out he was a man of the land, a farmer and someone who likes the simple things in life. That being the case it was most fortunate that they arrived while the Adelaide Royal Show was still on.

Having over a hundred sheep himself he was most interested in everything to do with sheep and so we made sure we took in the sheep shearing exhibition. The first thing he noticed is that we don’t tie down our sheep’s legs, something he found really strange as his sheep aren’t so docile.

He did tell us though that unlike our merino sheep the fleece from his sheep wasn’t worth much and that he was lucky to get 50 Euro for the whole lot. What he does make money from though is the milk which unfortunately is a lot more labor intensive as it involves him milking them twice a day.

As far as shearing goes Aussie shearers can shear 150 -200 sheep a day and can strip a sheep of it’s fleece in under 3 minutes! Me, I reckon I’ll stick to blogging.

I’ve learned so many things from their stay here, some of which I will share on this as well as some of my other blogs, especially the Scenic Adelaide one. One thing for sure is that I’ve grown a lot closer to my cousins and I also have a better appreciation of those who live on the land and what they have to go through. If you think about it, if it wasn’t for them we would all be a hell of a lot worse off.

                       Address delivered by Hon. Henry H. Crapo, Governor of Michigan, before the Central Michigan Agricultural Society, at their Sheep-shearing Exhibition held … College Farm, on Thursday, May 24th, 1866

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Friday Funnies # 33 A Female Robot Secretary

Hey guys, welcome to this weeks latest Friday Funnies :thumbup_ee:  You know, as time goes by scientists come up with great new gadgets to make peoples lives easier, whether it’s at home, work or even for play. Like everything else jokes tend to move with the times.This particular joke is no different and I can safely say that it absolutely rocks! It actually combines a bit of robotic technology that brings both functionality and perhaps even a bit of naughty fun into the office :devil_tb:

If this doesn’t get a smile out of you then you just do not have a sense of humor. Oh, this is one of those jokes that has a moral to it. See if you can work out what it is.

Two friends meet in the office of one of them, a notorious techno-geek.

“Hey, bud, how are ya?”

“I’m good. Congratulations, that new secretary of yours is beautiful!”

“Well, I’m glad you like her. Believe it or not, she’s a robot!”

“No way, how could that be?”

“Way! She’s the latest model from Japan. Lemme tell you how she works. If you squeeze her left boob, she takes dictation. If you squeeze her right boob, she types a letter. And that’s not all, she can have sex, too!”

“Holy shit! You’re kidding, right?”

“No, she’s something, huh? Tell you what, you can even borrow her.”

So, his friend takes her into the restroom and is in there with her for a while. Suddenly, he hears him screaming “Eeeeyaaaaa! Heeelp” Ooooooh! Aaaaaaah! eeeeeeeeeaaargghhhh!”

The guy says, “Shit! I forgot to tell him her ass is a pencil sharpener!”

African Bullfrog And The iPhone

You have to admit, that was pretty funny  :lol_ee:

And finally, a word from everybody’s favourite Aunty, Aunty Acid!

Aunty Acid Shops cartoon

That’s it guys, have a great weekend.

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About Peter Pelliccia"