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Man’s Struggle To Control His Urges

My last post got me to thinking that I should start up another category where I could put all my ‘fun’ posts into. I’ve decided to call the category Just For Fun and the sky is the limit in regards to what I actually post into it.

Now I know I am not a particularly good poet, nowhere near the standards of Kikolani or Inquest, but I still continue to churn out a piece every now and again and some of them may be quite crass, like the one you are about to read. Before you go onto read it a word of warning, some community blog sites actually deleted it because they said it offended some of their readers. I suppose that is one of the advantages of hosting your own blog, that you can post anything your little heart desires and take whatever lumps comes your way.

Personally, I thought it amusing but the warning remains, so read at your own peril!

The snake in my pants has a mind of his own
On many an occasion this has been shown
He may hang to the left, or maybe to the right
Beware if he pops out, you may get a fright

It bothers me that I have no control
It always tries to achieve it’s own goal
No matter what I try and do or think
That damn snake will refuse to shrink

Even when it was time to take a leak
One had to take care or they would shriek
No more than two shakes was the saying
More than two and you would be playing

I am forced to sit and grin and smirk
Or if I must stand, out comes the shirt
I must try to hide the bulge that shows
Or my face turns red and really glows

I know what makes it act like this
It’s hoping that I may sneak a kiss
Pick up a hot girl to take to bed
So he can bury the exposed head

Ah but his master has high morals
Way too much for this snakes laurels
Many an occasion he thought me a freak
So many that all he could do was weep

Then came a time when I would marry
No more in the pants did he have to tarry
As the years went on things would change
She would think my sexual urges so strange

So in the end he still hangs there
Balls for friends, poking through hair
Sometimes to the left, or to the right
Never quite happy with his plight

Well that’s it. I hope that you didn’t find it overly offensive. If you did perhaps you could tell me why?


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Peter Pelliccia

I'm an Aussie blogger who loves to blog and share everything that I've learned on my blogging journey, including blogging tips and ways to blog for money. I am also trying to make my way on YouTube. You can follow my progress by subscribing to My Bonzer Channel.

This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. I think it is quite amusing! :) Not offensive in the least, but then again, I have been told I have an awesome sense of humor.

    Kristis last blog post..Southwest Mansion

  2. Thanks Kristy, I think I can live with quite amusing ;) I never could understand how someone could find it offensive. I reckon you just can’t please everyone.

  3. It was a fascinating look into a man’s psyche. :)

    Vered – MomGrinds last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Mona Lisa, Enhanced

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