Yay, it’s Friday Funnies time again and so it is with great pleasure that I present to you Friday Funnies #38 ! Yep, that means that its been going for a whole 38 weeks! Man that has gone quickly hasn’t it? OK, so I reckon you’ve gathered from the title of the post that it’s going to have something to do with the Irish and of course you’re correct What you don’t know is that I’m going to share not one but two incredibly funny Irish jokes with you and they both involve accidents.
The Irish Road Accident
Paddy phones an ambulance because his mate’s been hit by a car.
Paddy: ‘Get an ambulance here quick, he’s bleeding from his nose and
Hey guys, I hope you can control you’re laughter long enough to head on over to my post about how you can win FREE web hosting for a year!
ears and I tink both his legs are broken.’
Operator: ‘What is your location sir?’
Paddy: ‘Outside number 28 Eucalyptus Street .’
Operator: ‘How do you spell that sir?’
Silence…. (heavy breathing) and after a minute.
Operator: ‘Are you there sir?’
More heavy breathing and another minute later.
Operator: ‘Sir, can you hear me?’
This goes on for another few minutes until….
Operator: ‘Sir, please answer me. Can you still hear me?’
Paddy: ‘Yes, sorry bout dat… I couldn’t spell eucalyptus, so I just
dragged him round to number 3 Oak Street .’
OK, now for joke #2
The Irish Sawmill Accident
Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill.
One day, Mick slips and his arm gets caught and severed by the big bench saw.
Paddy quickly puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick to the local hospital.
Next day, Paddy goes to the hospital and asks after Mick.
The nurse says, “Oh he’s out in Rehab exercising”.
Paddy couldn’t believe it, but there’s Mick out the back exercising his now re-attached arm.
Ninja Warning! Read this post if you want to make sure Google doesn’t take away your PR!
The very next day he’s back at work in the saw mill.
A couple of days go by, and then Mick slips and severs his leg on another bloody big saw.
So Paddy puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick off to the hospital.
Next day he calls in to see him and asks the nurse how he is.
The nurse replies, “He’s out in the Rehab again exercising”.
And sure enough, there’s Mick out there doing some serious work on the treadmill.
And very soon Mick comes back to work.
But, as usual, within a couple of days he has another accident and severs his head.
Wearily Paddy puts the head in a plastic bag and transports it and Mick to the hospital.
Next day he goes in and asks the nurse how Mick is.
The nurse breaks down and cries and says, “He’s dead.”
Paddy is shocked, but not surprised…
“I suppose the saw finally did him in.”
“No”, says the nurse…. “Some dopey bastard put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated.
Now for an Irishman telling Irish jokes
Some Funny Irish Humour
And last but not least, some words of wisdom from everybody’s favourite, Aunty Acid and why she ended her singing career. To tell you the truth I know exactly how she feels. Have a great weekend guys.
Oh, just in case you want a collection of your own Irish Jokes
The World’s Best Irish Jokes 500 Best Irish Jokes and Limericks
SoreThumb - You Just Can't Ignore It!SoreThumb is a revolutionary new way to help you make DAMN sure that the visitors on your site take notice of your ads, your links, your call-to-actions, your opt-in-boxes, your social icons and like buttons – it’s like your own personal spotlight operato
Page Expiration Robot PRO Multi-Site [WSO]PER is the ultimate conversion tool. Expire posts or pages on a visitor-by-visitor basis after a specified amount of time with intelligent countdown timers. Then redirect them to any URL.
Covert Geo TargeterNew WordPress Plugin Lets You Easily Geo Target Your Blog And Insert Your Visitor's Actual Geo Location Anywhere On Your Blogs - Resulting In A Massive Boost In Conversions and Revenue!
WP LinkizerWP Linkizer automatically turns every link into your blogs content into a money making machine. It does this by split testing multiple anchor text phrases and defaulting to the phrase thats gets the highest click through rate.
CommentLuv Premium - Unlimited LicenseThe famous CommentLuv Premium is active on over 50,000 WordPress blogs. Finally available on JVZoo. Increase your comments, traffic and encourage visitors to share your posts. Affiliates http://ql2.me/clpaff
WP DupizerWP Dupizer deletes duplicate content found within your site manually or automatically. Gives all posts and pages a duplicate score.