Friday Funnies #25 Little Ralphy Aunty Acid And More
Friday, July 27th, 2012 at
Did you like the post? Share it with your friends.
Have you ever thought how much one day is pretty much like another? You get up, go to work, go home watch a bit of TV then you go to sleep and when you wake up it starts all over again. You know the old saying, ‘same shit, different day’? Well that’s why I love Fridays, because on Friday I get to give you something different. Yep, you can rest assured that on each and every Friday you get can drop into my latest Friday Funnies post and be presented with a new and funny situation, whether it’s a video, joke or a funny image. Heck,sometimes you may get all three! You just never know with Friday Funnies Day!
Today I’m going to introduce you to little Ralphy. To tell you the honest truth I reckon he’s really little Johnny in disguise.
LITTLE RALPHY ON MATH
A teacher asks her class, ‘If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?’ She calls on little Ralphy.
He replies, ‘None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.’
The teacher replies, ‘The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking..’
Then little RALPHY says, ‘I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?’
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, ‘Well, I suppose the one that’s gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.’
To which Little RALPHY replied, ‘The correct answer is ‘the one with the wedding ring on,’ but I like your thinking.’
LITTLE RALPHY ON MATH
Little RALPHY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
‘Why?’ asks the father?
‘The teacher asked ‘How much is 2×3,” I said ’6′, replies RALPHY.
‘But that’s right!’ says his dad.
‘Yeah, but then she asked me ‘How much is 3×2?”
‘What’s the fucking difference?’ asks the father.
‘That’s what I said!’
LITTLE RALPHY ON ENGLISH
Little RALPHY goes to school, and the teacher says, ‘Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?’
RALPHY says ‘Mas-tur-bate..’
Miss Rogers smiles and says, ‘Wow, little RALPHY, that’s a mouthful.’
Little RALPHY says, ‘No, Miss Rogers, you’re thinking of a blowjob.’
LITTLE RALPHY ON GRAMMAR
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word ‘beautiful’ in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, ‘My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.’
‘Very good, Suzie,’ replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
‘My mummy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully.’
She said, ‘Excellent, Michael!’ Then the teacher reluctantly called on little RALPHY.
‘Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said ‘Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!”
In las weeks Friday Funnies I introduced you to Paddy and so I thought it only fair I should include a little bit of Paddy in this weeks post.
Paddy goes into a Dublin Florist shop and says, “I would like to buy a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend”.
The florist looked at him and said, “Certainly Sir, what is it you’re after?”
“A root “, Paddy replies.
Which just goes to show you the Irish, just like any other man on this planet, are only interested in one thing.
Before we get to the video I’m going to introduce you to Aunty Acid!
And now for the video, an pretty funny Aussie beer commercial.
The FlexSqueeze Theme gives my blog that professional look. I loved it so much that I bought the developers license. It's the easiest most customizable theme I've come across. See how easy it is to change your theme's appearance! Compare it to Thesis to see how much better it is! Check out some of the latest Latest Updates I highly recommend you to get your FlexSqueeze copy today!
SoreThumb - You Just Can't Ignore It!SoreThumb is a revolutionary new way to help you make DAMN sure that the visitors on your site take notice of your ads, your links, your call-to-actions, your opt-in-boxes, your social icons and like buttons – it’s like your own personal spotlight operato
CommentLuv Premium - Unlimited LicenseThe famous CommentLuv Premium is active on over 50,000 WordPress blogs. Finally available on JVZoo. Increase your comments, traffic and encourage visitors to share your posts. Affiliates http://ql2.me/clpaff
Covert MessengerNew WordPress Plugin Lets You Easily Create Cool Intant Messenger Ads On Your Blogs - These Ads Will Suck Your Visitors In and Literally Force Them To Click On Any Link You Want!
WP LinkizerWP Linkizer automatically turns every link into your blogs content into a money making machine. It does this by split testing multiple anchor text phrases and defaulting to the phrase thats gets the highest click through rate.
Covert Social BuzzCovert Social Buzz - Brand New WordPress Plugin That Will Increase Your Social Traffic In 5 Minutes Or Less!
Covert Geo TargeterNew WordPress Plugin Lets You Easily Geo Target Your Blog And Insert Your Visitor's Actual Geo Location Anywhere On Your Blogs - Resulting In A Massive Boost In Conversions and Revenue!
Page Expiration Robot PRO Multi-Site [WSO]PER is the ultimate conversion tool. Expire posts or pages on a visitor-by-visitor basis after a specified amount of time with intelligent countdown timers. Then redirect them to any URL.