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Childbirth Jokes Friday Funnies #283

I got this email today which I’m sure is the first ever childbirth joke that’s ever hit my inbox. I thought it was a cracker of a childbirth joke. I sure hope you agree.

A Childbirth Joke Childbirth at 65

With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old friend of mine was able to give birth. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, I went to visit.

“May I see the new baby?” I asked.

“Not yet,” she said…. “I’ll make coffee and we can visit for a while, first.”

Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, “May I see the new baby now?”

“No, not yet,” she said.

After another few minutes had elapsed,

I asked again, “May I see the baby now?”

“No, not yet,” replied my friend.

Growing very impatient, I asked, “Well, when can I see the baby?”

“WHEN HE CRIES!” she told me.

“WHEN HE CRIES?” I demanded. “Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?”


I thought that was pretty cool so I decided if I could find another childbirth joke. I found this childbirth joke on Pinterest. Clicking on the image will take you to the Pinterest page.

childbirth joke

What makes this funny is I can almost see it happening in a delivery room out there. :wink_ee:

I reckon this next childbirth joke took place somewhere in Australia :wink:

Sheila, pregnant with her first child, was paying a visit to her obstetrician. After her scan and consequent examination, she shyly began, “My husband wants me to ask you if its still okay…”
“I know, I know.” the doctor interrupts, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “I get asked that all the time. Don’t you worry at all, sex is fine until late in the pregnancy.”
“No, that’s not it at all,” Sheila confessed. “He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn.”

OK guys, hope you liked that Friday Funnies.If you like some more laughs check out my Friday Funnies category or you can read some of my really funny sports jokes.

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Peter Pelliccia

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This Post Has 14 Comments

  1. Haha its a funny post specially these lines ““No, not yet,” replied my friend.

    Growing very impatient, I asked, “Well, when can I see the baby?”

    “WHEN HE CRIES!” she told me.”

    Keep sharing.
    Bethe recently posted…Facts About Adolf HitlerMy Profile

  2. Twitter:
    Great jokes but my favorite was the last one: “He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn.” Really funny but also a bit closer to the truth than a lot of us might care to admit!

  3. I actually am search for some funny quotes and google lead me hear. The joke made me laugh really! :) Thank you for sharing this.

  4. LOL.

    That was hilarious, there’s always a joke for almost anything out there. The list could be longer though. But nevertheless, it was funny.

  5. good joke

    The Perfect Son.
    A: I have the perfect son.
    B: Does he smoke?
    A: No, he doesn’t.
    B: Does he drink whiskey?
    A: No, he doesn’t.
    B: Does he ever come home late?
    A: No, he doesn’t.
    B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
    A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

  6. Twitter:
    That last joke definitely came from down under. Oh Sheila, of course you can still mow the lawn LOL! Thanks for the Friday funnies.

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