I know this is supposed to be a Friday Funnies post, and that it’s supposed to be about Biker jokes, but I have this very touching story to tell you first. It’s all about that very special last kiss.
It happened back on January 9th. A group of Illinois bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge.
George, their leader, a burly man of 53, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper who was trying to talk her down off the railing, and says, “Hey Baby…..whatcha doin’ up there on that railin’?”
She says tearfully, “I’m going to commit suicide!!”
While he didn’t want to appear ‘sensitive’, George also didn’t want to miss this ‘be-a-legend’ opportunity either so he asked…”Well, before you jump, Honey-Babe… Why don’t you give ole George here your best last kiss?”
So, with no hesitation, she leaned back over the railing and gave old George a long, deep, lingering kiss followed by another even BETTER one.
When they breathlessly finished, George gets a big thumbs-up approval from his biker-buddies, the onlookers, and even the State Trooper, and says, “Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had, Honey! That’s a real talent you’re wasting, Sugar Shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why the hell are you committing suicide?”
“My parents don’t like me dressing up like a girl.”
It’s still unclear whether she jumped or was pushed.
More Biker Jokes
This guy buys a secondhand Harley Davidson and comments on how the bike and the chrome in particular was in such good condition. He then asks how he has managed to keep it in such pristine condition, to which the owner replied that if he ever thought that it was about to rain he would rub Vaseline on the chrome to protect it from the rain.
The next night he rides over to his girlfriend’s house for dinner. Being the first time that he has gone over she meets him on the doorstep.
‘Hey Stud’ she whispers, ‘I gotta tell you something before you go in. ‘During dinner we don’t talk and anyone who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.’
‘No problem’ he says as they go in.
He is shocked at the amount of unwashed dishes stacked everywhere. There are stacks in the living room, the family room and even on the stairs. Everywhere he looks he sees dirty dishes. As they sit down for dinner he notices that no-one was saying a word. As the dinner was progressing he thought that he may as well take advantage of the situation so he leans over and kisses his girlfriend. Not a word is said, so he decided to play with her breasts and still nothing. Taking the bull by the horns, he stands her up, strips her naked and has passionate sex with her leaning over the dinner table and still no-one says a word.
The biker looks over at the mother and thinking that she was looking pretty hot he decided to have his way with her as well and still nothing. He then notices a few raindrops hitting the tin roof and quickly whips out the jar of Vaseline so that he could take care of his new Harley, when suddenly the father stands up and shouts, ‘All right, all right! I’ll do the bloody dishes!’
And finally, just to finish this weeks Friday Funnies Biker Jokes I have the following biker joke image.
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