Being The Perfect Blog Host

The other day as I was roaming the Blogosphere I happened upon a blog that mentioned something called ‘Black Friday‘. Being an Australian I had no idea what Black Friday was, for all I knew it could have been some Satanic ritual that was performed some weeks after Halloween, and so I left a comment asking what Black Friday Stood For? As it turns out the owner of the blog must have followed me to this blog, read my post What Type Of Commentator Do You Aspire To Be ? and left a reply on his post insinuating that I was an obnoxious commentator? I replied pointing out that in no way was that an accurate inference citing the facts that;

  • I was not a robot and so did not fit the Robotic Commentator category.
  • As my comment was longer than his post I also didn’t fit the Hit And Run Category
  • Lastly I didn’t leave a spam link so I wasn’t a ‘Spam Link King!’

I then went on to explain how I was an Australian and was generally interested in knowing the origins of Black Friday. I did point out that I had noticed he provided some sort of link but I thought it was a good excuse for a comment and that he wouldn’t mind the interaction. Well that was it. Apparently I had put on some tone and he was only replying in kind.

This all brought to mind my post on Commenting Etiquette where I made the analogy of a blog being a person’s home and how we as commentators should keep that in mind and act accordingly. I then thought how we, as blog owners, are inviting these commentators into our home as guests and we should therefore treat them as such. What does this mean? Basically, there are two very important points we should keep in mind.

  1. Be Civil: You are the host, so act like one. At all times you should be polite to your guests even if they can sometimes be a little rude. As a blogger we have the opportunity to take the time to think about how we are to respond to any comments left.
  2. Do Not Assume: Making assumptions will usually lead to one party or another putting their foot in their mouth. As bloggers we should remember that we will get guests from all over the world, people who honestly do not know what the hell ‘Black Friday’ is and if they ask for some sort of clarification in a post, we as hosts should supply that. For stuff sake, soliciting comments is what we aspire to so don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

The thing is that we are all human and are prone to mistakes. There may well be a time when we forget ourselves and we are less than perfect hosts. When that happens take the higher path and admit that you are wrong and make amends. Don’t be like the blogger at the beginning of this post, who upon finding out that he had erred, rather than apologizing and setting things right, had actually deleted all the comments that made him look bad.

Oh, in case you are wondering I actually asked Mitch, who by the way has done a very interesting series on Book Writing, what Black Friday was all about and he explained it as being the Friday after Thanksgiving which was the busiest shopping day of the year, so busy that a lot of the retail business made enough sales to go from the red into the black.

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Peter Pelliccia

I'm an Aussie blogger who loves to blog and share everything that I've learned on my blogging journey, including blogging tips and ways to blog for money. I am also trying to make my way on YouTube. You can follow my progress by subscribing to My Bonzer Channel.

This Post Has 36 Comments

  1. Yeah I only found out what black friday was from an american tv show I watched last year, haha!

    Totally agree with you on the two points though. Another thing I find is its sometimes hard to judge someones ‘attitude’ through a comment – whereas you think they might be coming across rude, they might just feel its a polite question…is very strange no? lol

    Dan´s Last blog post..Craft Your Way To Success

  2. That is so true Dan, and wouldn’t the world be a better place if we were to give people the benefit of the doubt. Still, I don’t begrudge the experience as it gave me the opportunity for this post and I now have one less blog that I have to visit.

  3. Andrew, the sad thing about all this is that I was not being rude at all. I was sincere in my comment and the fact that it was a no-follow blog means that I would not have got any link juice from the comment anyway. Thanks for dropping in.


  4. Twitter:
    Very good post, Sire, and thanks for the mention. I’ve learned over the years that my first reaction to something might be incorrect, so I need to take a step back, evaluate again, and if I’m still not sure then ask the person to clarify their statement. Saves a lot of possible anguish later on.

    Mitch´s Last blog post..Purchasing An Existing Domain Name

    1. You know Mitch, it’s a good thing that I am thick skinned as I have taken a lot of crap over my life and I have been able to shrug it off and get on with what had to be done. I just found that blogger to be rude and I hope that others, by reading this post, may take the time to reflect on how they are going to reply to certain commentators before jumping, unnecessarily, down their virtual throats.


      1. Twitter:
        I’m not close to thick skinned, but I know when to fire at people and when to ask more questions. I’m wondering if the guy has learned any lessons of contrition whatsoever; too bad I don’t even remember who he was.

        Mitch´s Last blog post..Time Is Always A Factor

        1. I doubt very much that he has learned anything at all. His action of deleting the comments that would point to any wrongdoing on his part shows only that he is only interested in covering up his misdoings. Were it not for the fact that you, as a fellow American, interceded on my part, for which I am eternally grateful, I doubt that he would acknowledge any wrong doing at all.

          1. Yep, the funny thing is that I got all the emails today as I had originally subscribed to the comment. It’s amazing how much he changed, and why close the comment form?

          2. Of course! That makes perfect sense. I never got to see your comment, so he must have deleted that almost straight away.


          3. Twitter:
            I just found it. I can’t believe how he re-edited that sucker. He left your original comment, then added a link, as if he were answering you. That’s such a weasel move; I’m not going back either.

            Mitch´s Last blog post..Book Writing Series Part Five – Editing


          4. Twitter:
            I know why; because he knew that you and I had already left comments, and that any changes he made would notify us, and he didn’t want us to comment on those changes. So be it; he’s done and over with.

            Mitch´s Last blog post..Purchasing An Existing Domain Name

  5. Hi Sire
    Black Friday also has another meaning in the UK. It’s the day that most offices break up for Christmas at half day, so you get thousands of merry happy office workers hitting the pubs and drinking till they drop. After a few hours the merry mood changes and anyone who has any sense goes home before the trouble starts. And the trouble does start and go on for hours. I used to work as security in a club for a number of years and black Friday was the one day of the year everyone dreaded working.

    1. Thanks for the heads up Khaled, I will make sure not to hang around on your Black Friday, just in case I am in your neck of the woods on that particular day. I have enough hassles without having to dodge a buch of drunken revelers.

  6. Wow, that is sad that the blog owner reacted like that. If you are not happy about someone’s comment enough to say that they are an “obnoxious commentator” then they should just moderate your comment out. I probably wouldn’t bother with that person’s blog again.
    Luckily, I have never had to deal with any commentators I felt were being rude. I guess if they want to be rude, they are just wasting their time by making a comment.
    Nice job reiterating comment etiquette as it seems that a lot of people still don’t get it.

    Andrew´s Last blog post..Convert Your Pictures to Text at Text-Image.com

  7. I like what you said about treating people who come to your blog as a guest to your house.

    That is how I treat my blog as well :-) I write my post as if I was talking to my guest in my kitchen table. When people comment on my post, I treat them like a person visiting my home. When I go commenting on other people’s blog I respect them as I am in there home.

    Thanks for the post.
    Giovanna Garcia

    giovanna garcia´s Last blog post..The Meaning of A Family

    1. That is probably why I feel so welcome when I come and visit you at your blog. Perhaps next time I am over you can serve me a nice hot cup of coffee while I read your blog. :thumbup_tb:

  8. the guy thiought it was a spammy comment wand he went complaining at ya?guess he does not have anything better to do… lol

    I only knew what black friday was until last year, when a fellow portuguese blogger talked about how he used this day to profit… Im not an american, so i do not understand completly why people go shopping like crazy on that particular friday….

    Hugo Santos´s Last blog post..Emergency Room Final Considerations

    1. That is what I tried to explain to the guy, that a lot of his readers readers may not have heard of the term before. To which he replied (and then deleted)

      Well, if you’re really in the dark, its a term used for the day after Thanksgiving as its usually the busiest shopping day in America. Even though you’re overseas, you have at least heard of “Cyber Monday”, right? That is the first Monday after Black Friday and is generally the busiest day for online retailers.

      I’m afraid I’ve never heard of Cyber Monday either. :doh_tb:

      1. cyber monday? that one is new for me….

        Hugo Santos´s Last blog post..Did i just got Slapped by Google?

        1. You see what I mean Hugo? He is being so condescending it’s unbelievable.

      2. I am not sure if it is arrogance or ignorance not to realize that people in other parts of the world may not be familiar with American traditions. My guess is this guy is totally ignorant of customs in your part of the world.

        I see many with harsh comment policies but I tend to be a little liberal because it is so easy to mis-interpret a comment.

        Ned Carey´s Last blog post..The Power of Positive Thinking

        1. Perhaps it was a bit of both Ned. The thing is as a blogger one has to be a bit more tolerant of other people’s knowledge when pertaining to subject matter that is culture specific. Thanks for the comment mate.

  9. I always treat my “guest” as i would want them to treat me. also i think that dedicating some time to leave a comment, is not only good but precious. imagine that companies PAY for feedback and a blogger get’s it for “free” as a courtesy of his readers. i am really thankful to my commenters! nice post Sire

    stratosg´s Last blog post..Portfolio site is up!

    1. Thanks Stratos. I do try to be nice to my commentators and to bloggers that I visit. I certainly do not go out of my way to be obnoxious. That would defeat the purpose of commenting in the first place.

  10. I forgot all about that definition of black friday…I traditionally think of it as shopping hell, referred to as “black” by employees of major retailers who dread the day all year long, thanks for the reminder of the actual origin of the name

    Jeremy´s Last blog post..Want to Bitch? Now’s your chance!

    1. Actually Jeremy I think your version is closer to the truth as far as the origin of Black Friday goes. It wasn’t until after the merchants figured that this had negative connotations that they changed it to the modern day version.

  11. That is exactly why I did ask Kim, because I wanted to start a conversation and he left a perfect opening. I even subscribed to the comment so that I would get his response which would enable me ‘boomerang’ back to add to the conversation. If everyone Googled everything there would be a lot less comments on our posts.

    We don’t really have Black Fridays here. We do have sales but after an incident many years ago, they usually control the amount of people they let in so that we don’t have any accidents. At least they did. As a bloke I don’t go to ‘sales’.

  12. Well, I might silently wonder why you didn’t use google to look up the term but I would still politely answer your question, if you asked on my site. And I know I’ve done the same thing – asked a question about something that I could have probably looked up but I wanted to start a conversation.

    I despise Black Friday – in a type of retaliation a number of us support Buy Nothing Day – while everyone is frantically shopping we challenge ourselves to buy absolutely nothing for one day. This year I wasn’t successful – I had no food in the house and had to go to the little market down the street for something to eat – I should have planned ahead.

    Kim Woodbridge´s Last blog post..Stuff This in Your RSS – 12/02/08 – Eleblog

  13. Well, I don’t celebrate Black Friday either. All I know about it is that it’s the time where we have a jumbo sale across the blogosphere on that day. I got a 75% discount for a 2-year hosting from Hostgator on that day.

    Now back to being a perfect host, for the most part I do treat them as of they are guest in my house. Though on some occasions, I did chase them out of my blog for spamming. I love the interaction with my guests on and off the blog and I don’t see myself undoing it anytime soon.

    Yan

    Blog for Beginners´s Last blog post..T3leads – Highest Paying Pay-Per-Lead Affiliate Program?

  14. That’s it Yan, sometimes guest that do not behave need to be shown the door. :nono_tb:

  15. You’d think that after talking about commenting, he would recognize a valid one when he saw it. That’s like a host tossing you out of the party because you brought a hostess gift of moldy cheese, without realizing that it was the finest quality blue cheese.

    Glad to see that you did get an explanation as to what we mean by Black Friday, though. I was wondering!

    –Deb´s Last blog post..Domain Question for You Experts

  16. Well you know what they say about assuming things….

    ….they make an “ass” out of “u&me” :smile1_ee:

    Caleb´s Last blog post..Whitehat, Blackhat, and Now Bluehat Techniques!

    1. That is so true Caleb, and not only that, his actions have cost him the readership of at least one blogger.

  17. Yep, thanks to Google and my mate Mitch. Although we have sales in Australia I don’t recall any that we have given a particular name to that occurs ever year, except for your normal Xamas sales and such.

  18. Your use of the word “host” is a good one — we are in fact inviting folks into our space when we write. The idea that someone would be rude in response to a comment is strange to me, perhaps because I don’t tend to generate that many comments, so I cherish them all!

    People sometimes say that social media is like grammar school again: people worrying about friending and de-friending. This type of negative reaction when someone writes a comment you don’t like is the same thing: it reminds me of a neighbour who used to state “you’re the boss at your house, I’m the boss at mine!” – So long as I was at her house, it was her game, or else.

    So refreshing that we can all relive our youth again, behind the safety of a glowing monitor… ;)

    Andrea Hill´s Last blog post..Social Media Mullets

  19. Hey Andrea, I used to have a neighbor like that. I’ve always thought it a bit childish. As for the ‘rude’ blogger, he didn’t have many comments so you would think he would be more hospitable towards his guests. Still it wasn’t a total loss as it allowed me the resources for what has turned out to be quite a popular post.

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